No Rest for the Wicked S3 Ep18
by Bad Day at Black Rock
Summary: Sam and Kayla try to prepare for Dean's death while trying to save his life.
1. Chapter 1

Author's note: These fics are based on real episodes from Supernatural. The characters and plots belong to the creator and writers for the show. If you want background on the new character you can read the previous episodes.

_From Time is on my Side_

"Hey Bela," Dean spoke into his cell phone. "Here's a fun fact you may not know. I felt your hand in my pocket when you swiped that hotel receipt."

"Dean you don't understand."

"I'm pretty sure I understand perfectly. See I noticed something interesting in your hotel room. Something tucked above your door, an herb, devil's shoestring. There's only one use for that, holding hellhounds at bay. So I went back and took another look at your parent's obit., turns out they died ten years ago today. You didn't kill them, a demon did your dirty work. You made a deal, and it's come due. Is that why you stole the colt? Try to wiggle out of your deal? Our gun for your soul?"

"Yes." She would spare him the details because it was none of his business. The abuse she suffered at the hands of her father was her burden alone.

"But I'm guessing that wasn't enough."

"They changed the deal. I was supposed to kill Sam."

"Really, wow. Demons, untrustworthy. Shocker. Kind of a tight deadline too huh? What time is it? Oh, look at that. Almost midnight."

"Dean listen, I need help." She sobbed into the phone.

"Sweetheart we are weeks beyond help."

"I know I don't deserve it."

"Yeah you're right, you don't. But you know what the bitch of the bunch is? If you would have just come to us sooner and asked for help, we probably could have taken the colt and saved you."

"And yourself, you're right." God was he right. "I know about your deal Dean."

"Who told you that?"

"The demon that holds it. She holds mine too, she says she holds everyone's."

"She?"

"Her name's Lilith."

"Lilith?" He glanced to the side and Kayla and Sam looked at him, the demon Ruby had warned them about. The one that was after Sam.

"Maybe you can kill the bitch."

Dean paused. "I'll see you in hell."


	2. Chapter 2

Lazarus Rising

His heart pounded in his head and he couldn't run fast enough. He was so tired. With every stride it just seemed to get closer to his heels. With nowhere left to run and no strength left in his body he stopped and turned to face it. The hellhound stared him down, pacing back and forth before making the final leap to kill. Dean yelled out in agony as it tore into his flesh.

_The idea of death, the fear of it, haunts the human animal like nothing else_

_-Ernest Becker_

Dean jerked awake and sat up suddenly, staring down at the black and white sketch of a hellhound glaring up at him from a textbook. Kayla looked over from the chair; she had seen him fall asleep but wanted him to rest.

"You ok?"

"Yeah, fine."

Sam walked into the room. "Find anything good?"

He closed the book. "No, nothing."

"Well Bobby did, finally. A way to find Lilith."

"Wow, with just thirty hours to go. Let's just go to Mexico, drink some beer, watch a donkey show…"

Sam laughed quietly. "If we save you, let's not do that."

_If_ we save you. That 'if' was getting more frequent in their conversations.

He saw his facial expression and sat down. "Dean, we're cutting it close I know. But we're gonna get this done. I don't care what it takes, you're not gonna go to hell. I'm not letting you."

Dean watched in a quiet calm as his brother's face violently shifted to that of a demon's. He didn't freak out; he knew it was a hallucination. He'd been having them a lot but sure wasn't going to tell them about it. "Yeah, ok."


	3. Chapter 3

New Harmony, Indiana. Bobby's location finding doohickey pointed to the spot where Lilith was supposed to be, now anyway. They didn't have much time to wait for her to move again. Sam was all too eager to get moving.

"Alright. Let's go."

"Just wait a minute." Dean held a hand up.

It was the absolute last time and place Kayla wanted to argue with him, but they were on a deadline. "Dean we don't have time to wait."

"What's the problem?"

"What's the problem? Where do I begin?" He grimaced. "We don't know for sure that Lilith holds my deal, that intel came from number one capital liar. Second, even if she is there, we have no way to gank her. And third, isn't this the same Lilith that wants your head on a pole? Should I continue?"

Bobby raised an eyebrow. "Well don't you bring down a room."

"What do you suggest we do Dean?"

"Just because I gotta die doesn't mean you guys have to. Either we go in smart or we don't go in at all."

"Don't go in at all?" Kayla spit out. "We're just supposed to gather this information and sit on it, Dean, what the hell is your problem?"

"Ok calm down." Sam cut in. "I have a solution to this. A surefire way to confirm it's Lilith that holds your contract, as well as a bonefide, demon-killing tool."

"Damn it Sam, no."

"You're talking about Ruby." Kayla thought it was a great idea.

"If we summon Ruby, we can…"

"No! She is the Miss Universe of lying skanks! She told you she could save me, lie. She supposedly knows all this crap about Lilith but failed to mention the bitch owns my soul!"

"Ok, she's a liar. She's still got the knife."

"For all we know, she works for Lilith!"

"So give me another option Dean!"

Bobby was on their side. "He's right Dean."

"No! Damn it!" He took a breath. "Just no. We are not gonna make the same mistakes all over again." No one else was dying to save the other. Not again. "You guys wanna save me, find something else."

Bobby sighed and pulled on his jacket.

"Where you going Bobby?" Sam glanced back.

"I guess, to find something else." He looked between them and walked out the door.

"Apparently that's all we can do." Sam took the keys to the Impala and walked out after him.

"Let me guess." Dean looked up from the desk. "You think I'm wrong too."

She felt her breath tremble as she let it out and bit back her fear. Less than twenty four hours left and they didn't have an answer. "I can see your side of it."

"But you think I'm wrong. You think we should summon Ruby and get the knife. Go after this bigwig demon who may or may not be the one we're looking for, with a knife."

"I think…we should do everything we can." She went up behind him and slid her arms around his shoulders. "So what if Ruby's a liar, we can still get the knife out of her. Something is better than nothing, we could use the knife since we don't have the colt."

"I know." He turned around and stood up. "We do need the knife, regardless. Bobby had some spray paint in his shed right?"

"Um, I think so…"

"Good. I'm gonna need you to draw a devil's trap on the ceiling of the basement. Sam's gone to get the supplies he needs to summon Ruby and I'm not taking any chances."

"Okay." At least it was something.

As she turned to go he caught her by the wrist and pulled her back. "Hey, it'll be ok." He kissed her softly and she swore her heart skipped. His kisses were lingering now, each time feeling more like a final statement. "Okay?"

She nodded and managed a smile before heading to the shed. _Don't lose it now Kayla, keep your sanity._


	4. Chapter 4

Dean had been right about Sam. Kayla sat next to him at the top of the stairs, listening to their conversation about how Ruby could help Sam save his brother. She apparently thought his psychic abilities could be honed in time to kill Lilith before midnight. None of it sounded like good news to Dean, and he had heard enough.

He walked down the stairs. "So that's you huh? Our slutty little Yoda."

"Dean." She turned around. "Charming as ever." Kayla walked up behind him and she looked at her. "Can't you keep your dog on a leash?"

Dean smirked. "I knew you'd come. I knew Sam wouldn't listen. But you're not going to teach him anything, you understand me? Over my dead body."

"Huh." She laughed. "Well you're right about that."

"You _are_ going to give me that knife. And then you're going to crawl back into whatever slop you came from and never bother us again."

"You're brother is carrying a bomb inside of him and we'd be stupid not to use it."

"Dean, just…"

"Sam, don't." He shot at him. "Can't you see this is a trick? She wants you to buy into this whole demonic power, crap, thing. Hell, she probably wants you to become her little antichrist superstar."

"I want Lilith dead, that's it."

"Right, because you were human once. And you like kittens, and long walks on the beach."

"I'm so sick of proving myself to you! If you want to save yourself this is how, you dumb, spineless dick!"

He nodded and promptly punched her in the face. She looked shocked to say the least, and came right back at him. When Sam tried to stop her she punched him too. After a quick but violent match Dean stopped and grinned at her.

"What are you grinning at?"

"Missing something?" He held up her knife.

"I'll kill you, you son of a bitch!" She started after him but was caught in the devil's trap.

He smiled and pocketed the knife. "Like I said, I knew you were coming. Come on Sam."

"Are you just too stupid to live?" She yelled at him as they walked up the stairs. "Fine, you deserve hell! I wish I could be there to smell the flesh burning off your bones. I wish I could be there to hear you scream!"

"Yeah well, I wish you'd shut your pie hole but we don't all get what we want."

Kayla went slower than they did up the stairs, she still wasn't sure they should be taking this path. She caught a quick look at Ruby.

"This will be the end of him you know, he's going to die if he goes in like this."

She didn't respond. All she could do was follow the guys and pray she wasn't right. While the guys prepared the ammunition she went out to the front porch, it was easier to keep herself composed if she wasn't looking at him.

Inside, Sam wasn't exactly on board either. "Are we just gonna let Ruby rot down there? Dean, what if I really can stop Lilith?" He grimaced when he looked at him. "Stop looking at me like that."

"What you're just gonna give her the Carrie stare and she goes poof?"

"I don't know what Ruby meant. Maybe we should just go ask her."

"Sam you wanted the knife, I got you the knife."

"Dean all I'm saying is that last time, Lilith snapped her fingers and got thirty demons on our ass and all we got is one knife? It's like you said, we go in smart or we don't go in at all."

"Well this isn't smart."

"If there's a surefire way we should at least talk about it!"

"No. Don't you see the pattern? Dad's deal, my deal, now this. Every time one of us is up the creek the other one is begging to sell their soul. That's all this is Sam, Ruby's just jerking your chain down the road. You know what it's paved with and you know where it's going."

"What are you afraid of? This is me, I can handle it. If it'll save you…"

"Why even risk it?" How could he get through to him? When was this kid ever going to just shut up and listen to him?

"Because you're my brother. Because you did the same thing for me."

"And look how that turned out. Sammy all I'm saying is that you're my weak spot, and I'm yours."

"You don't mean that, we're family."

"Yeah and they sure as hell know it. They're using it against us."

"So we just stop looking out for each other?"

"We stop being martyrs. We stop spreading it for these demons. We take this knife, and go after Lilith our way. The way dad taught us to. If we go down, at least we go down swinging."

He shook his head. "And that's all great for us Dean, it's what we do. Go down in a hail of fire, we're hunters, always have been." Sam checked the room to make sure she was still outside. "But what about her? You're going to send her in half cocked to go down swinging?"

"Absolutely not." He put the knife in his bag. "She's not going."

"What do you mean she's not going?"

"She'll go to Indiana with us because I gotta put it straight to you Sammy, I gotta spend some time with her. But when it gets to be that time, she's not going. She sleeps, we walk."

"She sleeps. Dude, she's not that stupid."

"No," he held up a plastic bag that had a small pile of crushed powder in the corner. "But she'll get thirsty."

He was kind of stunned. "You'd do that to her?"

"To save her life? You bet your ass."


	5. Chapter 5

On the way to Indiana they got stopped by a cop who turned out to be a demon. The disturbing part was that Dean knew it was a demon because he could see its real face, the perks of being so close to the pit. Having yet another notch on the timeline seemed to shove the situation further into his face and he suddenly needed to stop. They were about twenty miles from New Harmony but he exited off the interstate.

"Dean what are you doing?" Sam looked back and made sure Bobby followed them off.

"We're stopping." He turned down the first street with a hotel sign and pulled in. "You're gonna tool around with Bobby for awhile huh?"

He caught his intention but couldn't believe it. They were five hours from midnight and he was going to make a pit stop? "Dean, we don't…"

"If you tell me we don't have time I _swear_ to God. We're stopping." He threw the Impala into park and got out, pulling his wallet out as he went into the main office.

Sam sighed heavily and wiped his mouth. "It's not that you don't deserve it."

She agreed with his logic but wasn't going to argue with Dean, not now. "It's kind of hard to tell him no, under the circumstances."

"You don't want to tell him no."

Which was true. They spent so much time the last three days preparing for this final blow they'd overlooked any one on one time that may have been possible. When Dean motioned her out of the car she followed him.

Walking behind him she couldn't decide what stance to take on this. They were so short on time, what if this ruined the last possibility to get out of his deal? On the other hand, what if this last possibility was just a stupid false hope that wasn't going to lead to anything? What if this really was that last time she'd be with him?

Convincing her wasn't hard. Dean kissed her while the door was still clicking shut and felt that same wave of anxiety he remembered from the hell house years ago. He was so eager to start something he never wanted to finish and now, now it was just going to be over. God he loved this girl.

He moved to the closest bed and laid her back but didn't make any move to take it further. No, he was going to savor every second. He loved the way she kissed him; not just that she wanted him, like she _needed_ him and it just felt like everything he was missing. All the time they'd spent apart seemed like a waste now.

His jacket fell to the floor, accompanied by his shirt and he broke the kiss only to peel her shirt over her head before pressing his lips firmly back to hers. If they'd let him go out like this he would. He moved to kiss her neck and loved the way she arched against him.

"Dean I love you."

Her voice trembled and he paused to stroke her hair, whispering against her ear. "I love you."

"Don't stop." She leaned up to kiss him again and he was more than willing to oblige.


	6. Chapter 6

Dean studied his reflection in the mirror. _Ten o'clock. _Two hours left and he had to start by leaving her. At least they had the chance to make love, if nothing else they'd made time for that. She'd been trying all day not to cry and she finally broke down, he offered her the water to calm her nerves. _You want a bottled water or something?_ Casual, like he'd done a hundred times and she never suspected a thing. He felt like shit.

He walked back into the room and saw her rubbing her temple; she wasn't going to last long. She yawned and noticed him standing there.

"I don't know why I'm so tired, I made sure to…"

Dean didn't look at her when she stopped and that may have given him away more than anything.

"Dean you didn't."

"Didn't what?" Of course she'd figure it out, how could she not?

"Did you put something in my drink?"

"By something, you're implying…"

"You drugged my drink, you're trying to keep me from going with you tonight!"

He nodded slightly, knowing this needless argument wasn't going to get them anywhere.

"Well that's just stupid," she blinked slowly but managed to keep her eyes open. "You can't stop me from going. It won't work."

"It's already working." He sat next to her. "I'm sorry, I just want you to be safe."

"And what about you? I'm supposed to be there to help you!" The tears were coming back.

"Sam will be there and if it goes bad, I don't want you there." He kissed her softly, hoping she'd just take it for what it was. "I'm sorry, ok? You can be mad later, I just don't want you getting hurt."

The plea in his voice let loose a stream of tears and she wrapped her arms around him. "Don't go, please don't leave."

He held her against him and felt the weakness in her touch; this was it. This was his last chance to say goodbye and he couldn't stop his own tears. "I'm sorry Kayla, I didn't wanna go out like this." His arms tightened around her. "It's kind of cool though right? Blaze of glory, going down for my little brother. Like in the movies."

A laugh broke through a cry and she nodded, pulling back to look at him. "Yeah, just like the movies."

He heard the strain in her voice. "Don't fight the effects, it's ok to just sleep."

"But Dean…"

"It's ok, I'll stay." He laid back on the bed and she curled in next to him, fighting to keep conscious just a while longer.

She tucked her head under his chin and found his hand. "I love you, you know?"

He nodded and kissed her on the forehead. "I love you too."

Her breathing slowed and evened for a moment before she spoke quietly. "Dean? If it goes bad tonight…"

_When it goes bad._ "Yeah."

"Stay strong, ok? We're coming for you." He didn't answer. "You believe me?"

"Hell yeah." He feigned the confidence in his voice. "It's gonna be ok."

She was quiet for awhile; he pulled back and saw that she had finally given in. He kissed her again and slowly got up. Sam was unexpectedly waiting in the hall and he quickly wiped the tears from his eyes.

Sam motioned in to Kayla. "Was she pissed?"

"Yeah."

"You ok?"

"Yeah." He answered, then walked back into the room and kissed her on top of the head before going out to the car.

Sam got in without a word, he didn't want to upset him.

He started the car but didn't change gears. "Shit man, I don't want to leave her like this."

"The only way to make sure she survives is if she's not there."

"I know." He finally backed out and got onto the road.


	7. Chapter 7

Lilith was possessing a little girl in suburbia and was holding what was left of the family hostage in the house. What was worse is that every neighbor was also possessed, Lilith's own secret service. The casualty count would be high tonight and it didn't matter. Lilith had to be stopped.

Sam and Dean went to work taking out the bodyguards while Bobby prepared everything he could for the final encounter. After hiding a body Dean suddenly was shoved up against a chain link fence.

"I'd like my knife back." Ruby's voice breathed on his ear.

"He doesn't have it." Sam put the knife to her throat. "Back off."

She stepped away from him.

"How'd you get out?"

"What you don't know about me could fill a book."

He was thrown off when he saw her real face. "You know I never knew before but you are one, _ugly_ broad."

She didn't have time for his cute talk. "Sam, give me the knife before you hurt yourself."

"You'll get it when this is over."

"It's already over. I tried to help you save him and you shot me down. He's done."

"If you try and stop me I'll kill you, bitch."

"Hit me with your best shot baby."

"Guys." Dean stopped them. "Cat fight later huh?"

They followed his gaze to the street where all the rest of the neighbors, now demons, had come out of their houses. As they retreated to the house Lilith was in, the sprinklers went off outside and doused the oncoming demons with holy water. Thank you Bobby. Sam managed to get the door open and they locked themselves in.

The group passed an elderly woman who had been dead for days from the look of it in the hallway. A man came out in the living room and Dean stopped him.

"We're here to help. Sir, where's your daughter?"

"It's not her anymore." His voice was shaky, God knows what he'd been put through already.

"Where is she?"

"She's upstairs."

Dean nodded. "Ok what I need you to do is go into the basement and put a line of salt at the door behind you."

"Not without my wife."

"Yes without your wife."

"No."

Dean punched him in the face, knocking him out cold. People were so damn hard to save nowadays. After stashing him in the basement they quietly made their way upstairs. Ruby followed behind them, apparently giving up on fighting with them for now.

The little girl was asleep with her mother in the girl's room. Mom's tear stained ashen face gave them only a glimpse of the nightmare that had been going on.

"Do it." She told Sam when she saw the knife. "Do it."

The girl started to wake and Sam hesitated. Was he really going to murder this little girl?

"Do it!"

She awoke and screamed at the top of her lungs, clinging to her mother for dear life. Dean grabbed Sam before he could swipe.

"It's not her! It's not her anymore."


	8. Chapter 8

"Alright you win. What do I have to do?"

Ruby looked at Sam and tilted her head. "What do you mean?"

"To save Dean."

Dean grabbed him. "What do you think you're doing?"

"Just shut up for a second. Ruby!"

"You had your chance! You can't just flip a switch, we needed time."

"There's gotta be something, there's gotta be some way. I mean whatever it is, I'll do it." Dean pulled him back and he fought against him. "I'm not gonna let you go to hell!"

"Yes you are!" He yelled and lowered his voice. "Yes you are. I'm sorry, I know this is my fault. But what you're doing is not going to save me, it's only going to kill you."

His eyes teared up and he had to face it. Kayla had it easy, not being here for the final act. "What am I supposed to do?"

"Keep fighting. Take care of my wheels." He kept himself from breaking down. "Take care of Kayla huh? She thinks she's really tough but you need to have her back, especially now. Remember what dad taught you, remember what _I_ taught you."

They all turned to the grandfather's clock as it struck midnight. Time was up.

He smiled, a last ditch effort to comfort his little brother.

"I'm sorry Dean." Ruby stated. "I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy."

He heard the hound and looked to the dining room. "Hell hound."

"Where?" Sam looked.

"There." As it stepped forward Dean dashed for the back room, Ruby and Sam following close behind him. They shoved the door shut and with shaking hands Dean drew the line of salt. After awhile the door stopped shaking.

"Give me the knife. Maybe I can fight it off, that stuff won't last forever."

Sam started to hand the knife over.

"Wait!" Dean yelled.

"Do you _want _to die?" She glared at him.

"It's not Ruby, Sam it's not Ruby!"

He tried to stab her but the knife flew out of his hand and he was thrown against the wall. Dean slammed onto his back on the table.

"How long have you been in her?"

"Not long." She answered, looking herself over. "But I like it, it's all grown up and pretty." Her eyes turned white.

"Where's Ruby?"

"She was a very bad girl. So I sent her far, far away."

"I shoulda seen it before." Dean grimaced, fighting against the hold on him. "But you all look alike to me."

She turned her attention to Sam and walked over. "Hello Sam, I've wanted to meet you for a very long time." She grabbed his face and kissed him. "Your lips are soft."

"Alright so you have me. Let my brother go."

"Silly goose. If you want to bargain, you have to have something that I want. You don't."

"So is this the big plan?" Dean caught her attention. "Drag me to hell, kill Sam, then what? You become Queen Bitch?"

"I don't have to answer to puppy chow." She smiled and opened the door. "Sick 'em boy."

Sam watched in horror, helpless, screaming for his mercy as Dean was torn apart by a hellhound he couldn't even see. The claw marks all became a blur of blood as he lost consciousness.

"No!"

"Yes." Lilith raised her hand and the room was filled with white light.

Sam shielded his eyes for a moment but felt nothing. When he looked at Lilith she was clearly shocked at the ineffectiveness, if not terrified. He stepped towards her.

"Back." She held up her hand, fearful. "I said back!"

He picked up Ruby's knife. "I don't think so." Before he could strike the demon streamed out of her.

Sam kneeled by his brother, his body beyond help. There was nothing he could do, he'd failed him.


	9. Chapter 9

Sam stared at the door like it was welded shut. How was he supposed to do this? What was he supposed to say?

Bobby spoke quietly. "You sure you want to do this by yourself?"

He shook his head, his voice dismal. "No."

"You want me to come in?"

He nodded slightly but knew he didn't really need to. This wasn't about Bobby. He agreed anyway, in case he lost it. The door clicked uninvitingly and he pushed it open.

Kayla looked up quickly as they walked in; she had woken up already past midnight and knew there was no way to get to them in time. She'd prayed a lot, waiting for them to come back.

Sam met her eyes and started crying again, a jerk reaction he couldn't stop. She stood and looked shocked, the same reaction he'd had even though they spent all year preparing. Her eyes filled with tears.

"Sam no…"

He hugged her tightly and felt the beginning quakes of sobbing. How could he have let this happen? "I'm sorry Kayla, I'm so sorry."

But she couldn't speak. The crying was uncontrollable, choking even and she didn't know what else to do. She wasn't even there for him when it happened.

How could he be gone?


End file.
